Getting there is half the fun

Heisenberg is out driving on the interstate, and he's really cruising. Sure enough, he gets pulled over by a state trooper. "Do you know how fast you were going, sir?" asks the state trooper.
"No," Heisenberg says, "but I can tell you exactly where I am!"


A neutron walks into a bar and orders a beer, and asks the bartender what he owes. "Hey," says the bartender, "for you, no charge!"


Two atoms end up in a car crash. They get out to assess the damage, and the first atom asks the second of he's OK. "Oh man," says the second atom, "I think I lost an electron!"
"Are you sure?" asks the first.
"Yeah," says the second, "I'm positive!"


Charlie was a chemist
But Chalie is no more
What Charlie thought was H2O was H2S04


What is the difference between a physicist, an engineer, and a mathematician?

If an engineer walks into a room and sees a fire in the middle and a bucket of water in the corner, he takes the bucket of water and pours it on the fire and puts it out.

If a physicist walks into a room and sees a fire in the middle and a bucket of water in the corner, he takes the bucket of water and pours it eloquently around the fire and lets the fire put itself out.

If a mathematician walks into a room and sees a fire in the middle and a bucket of water in the corner, he convinces himself there is a solution and leaves.

Posted by Evan at 5:27 PM